do it all and be it all

I can't. I just can't. There is no way I can do everything, be everything, AND do everything and be everything well. It's simply not possible. Not for me and not, I truly believe, for anyone.


I do believe I can make more consistent efforts to simplify, streamline, and organize my life. The problem I've had so far is that it's tough for someone like me - a free-spirited yet somehow still quite obsessive/compulsive person - to strike the balance between checking off the to-do list and not being super rigid. I swing between one extreme or the other. I'm either in a super lazy mood, wasting time thinking about random shit or I'm go-go-go-do-all-the-things like a Stepford wife on steroids. 

Here are my issues (let's add these to the ongoing list, shall we?): I struggle to eat well because I have a baby and I'm already spending an hour at night preparing her bags, my bags, our outfits, etc. for the next day and I often forget to make my breakfast and/or lunch. Solution? Chick-Fil-A. DUH. Which means that I sometimes don't stick to the weekly spending allowance that Hubby and I both have for ourselves. So this then turns into a budget issue where money gets tight because I'm not doing my part and then I find myself thinking,"Hey! I'll clean out my closet/drawers and sell/donate everything (which I should make a seasonal habit anyway because, HELLO, we accumulate a lot of junk)" but it's hard to find the time to do this because of the issues I already mentioned. Oh, and working out? Yeah. Right. It's just an absurd cycle of first-world problems, you guys. 

Before my grandfather passed away, I had already planned on letting Lucy stay with my mom this past weekend while Pierce was on his church trip in order to spend some time at home streamlining. Internally and externally. I needed a refresher. And I got it...just not in the way I had planned.

So here I am again, trying to figure out the best ways to eat well, save money, use my time, and enjoy this thing called life. Does anyone ever get this right? I love to cook, but find that I don't want to spend the time making good meals because Lucy is a baby and, let's face it, babies need our constant attention. So, instead, when she's down for the count I'm trying to spend time with Pierce or just relax. But then that pile of laundry that's been crouching in the corner like a giant cotton demon starts staring at me, along with the rug that desperately needs vacuuming and the floor that's gathering dog hair like it wants to knit me a sweater. 

It's just too much. But like all cycles, it can only be broken if I cut into it with a new habit that, effectively, transforms all the other habits out of sheer necessity. Like eating. How about I spend one hour a week making a meal plan? My husband has a cafeteria at work so it's not like I have to worry about what he eats during the day. Then I can set aside another hour during the week (before I pick up Lucy) shopping for things that are on that list and storing them here at my in-laws where I work remotely (so I can be close  to Lucy's daycare and still hold down a job). That way I won't have to pack them all up each night and add our cooler to the four bags I already bring with me each day (diaper, pump, purse, and computer). Theeeeeeen I won't spend money eating out as much or subsequently panic about our finances. Sounds easy enough.

But. It's hard. I've tried it before and it can be difficult to maintain my motivation. Perhaps I sound like a whiny slob who is entirely too spoiled and needs to learn some self-control. I wouldn't argue with you there. So I'm trying to make it work. I seriously long to be a good steward of the things I own and the things I have been equipped to use. I don't want them to own or use me and, up until this point, that's exactly what they've been doing.

Anyone have any tips on how to organize and streamline life without making it feel like you live by a checklist? I'm open for suggestions. Until then, please just pray I don't keep wasting time. It goes by too fast.


Red said...

Elliot Hulse is one of my favorite dudes on Youtube. I struggle with disciplining myself and motivating myself to do the things I need to do (but doesn't everyone?) but I love this video:

In fact all of them are really pretty awesome. But hope this might help! :)

My name is Wendi. said...

Thank you so much!

Anonymous said...

Oh girl, I here ya. I just have a two-month old (also named Lucy) and have a personality that swings between being carefree and spontaneous and being completely OCD. I really enjoyed your post because I can totally relate to the internal, first-world struggle: to relax or tighten up? I wrote these blog posts about some of those issues:

One thing that out found to be very helpful for people with our personality tendencies is the Storyline Planner:

It's a free download and has been very helpful for me because it organizes your time by projects and rewards you choose for finishing those projects. It's very good for people who are both big-picture and small-picture. I hope this helps you like it helped me! Take care and I look forward to reading more of your musings!

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh this is so creepy. I just went to your "cast of characters" page and saw that your daughter has the same middle name as our daughter too. Two Lucy Janes! Good taste! :)